My Impact Wrestling Overview (December 14, 2017)

Impact Wrestling

Episode 700

Ottawa, Ontario, Canada

Aberdeen Pavilion

Commentary: Jeremy Borash & Josh Mathews

It's the 700th episode of Impact! You would have thought that they'd make a bigger deal out of it.

Match #1

Impact Knockouts Championship #1 Contendership

Four-Way Match

Allie vs Sienna vs KC Spinelli vs Madison Rayne

• This was a match with a little bit of stakes behind it. However, it would have felt more important and more engaging if they focused on these characters more. An interview, a vignette or even a backstage interaction. Anything to get these characters across better instead of just being people in a match.
• Sienna lifts up Rayne for the AK-47 but gets rolled up by Allie for the pinfall.

Winner by pinfall: Allie

Match #2

Tag Team Match

Dezmond Xavier & Taiji Ishimori vs The Cult of Lee (Trevor Lee & Caleb Konley)

• This was an alright match. Lee is about to hit Ishimori with an assisted piledriver but Konley is knocked off of the ropes by a tree of woe'ed Xavier which allows Ishimori to roll Lee up for the pinfall.

Winners: Dezmond Xavier & Taiji Ishimori

Backstage Segment

Tonight, Johnny Impact, Petey Williams and Alberto El Patron take on Eli Drake, Chris Adonis and a mystery partner. Johnny Impact is speaking with Petey Williams when Alberto El Patron confronts Johnny about them having to team up tonight and tells Petey and him to be careful because "accidents happen all the time in that ring". Alberto then looks at Williams and asks if they he's the one that they call "The Canadian Destroyer". El Patron sort of chuckles at this, slaps Petey on the chest and tells them that he'll see them around.

Backstage Segment

Eli Drake (w/Chris Adonis) is speaking with someone and is telling them that everything is in the bag as planned and makes sure that this person knows what do to. The person is revealed to be Jimmy Jacobs.

Match #3

Six-Man Tag Team Match

Eli Drake, Chris Adonis & ??? vs Johnny Impact, Petey Williams & Alberto El Patron

• Jimmy Jacobs comes out to the stage after Drake and Adonis make their entrance. He says that he isn't the one who will be teaming up with them tonight and although he agreed to find them a partner, he didn't find them a partner. He found them the new monster of Impact Wrestling, Kongo Kong.
• ...Isn't that technically finding them a partner?
• "New" monster? Kongo Kong has been in Impact for months. Was he simply just not classified as a monster before this? Did Jacobs help him acquire a monster's license? What's new about Kongo Kong in Impact? 
• It appears as though Jacobs is now Kong's manager.
• I get that this was probably done to rebrand Kongo Kong but I feel as though there could have been a better way to go about this.
• Alberto follows through with his warning and gives Johnny a Backstabber (literally) but it doesn't mean the end of the match.
• Kong misses a Diving Body Splash on Williams which allows Johnny to hit a Superkick on Drake but this is 2017 and Superkicks in today's age are no longer moves that put away opponents.
• Kong Powerbombs Petey into the crowd on top of what I can only assume are plants.
• Alberto rams Drake into the ring post and sets up Johnny to hit the Starship Pain. Alberto barks at Johnny to follow through but Johnny decks Alberto off the apron as revenge for earlier.
• Johnny hits the Starship Pain but is pulled out of the ring by Alberto who DDTs him on the stage. Alberto runs to the ring, climbs the top rope and hits a splash for the pinfall on the Impact world champ.

Winners: Johnny Impact, Petey Williams & Alberto El Patron

Backstage Segment

Joseph Park is approached by Chandler Park who tells him that 2018 means that it's a new year and a new him, he's going to become a professional wrestler much to Joseph's dismay. Joseph tries to warn and discourage Chandler from becoming a professional wrestler but Chandler's mind is already made up.

Video Package

In three weeks, Impact Grand Champion, EC3 will take on Matt Sydal and Fallah Bah in a 3-Way Match for the Impact Grand Championship.

In-Ring Segment

James Storm and Moose come out and talk about their issues with Lashley, Dan Lambert and American Top Team who come out to the ring. Lambert proposes an Impact career vs career match and Storm accepts.

Match #4

Impact Knockouts Championship

Normal Match

Rosemary vs Laurel Van Ness

• Laurel ducks a mist attempt from Rosemary who is on the top rope but gets the mist on her hands. She gouges Rosemary's eyes with the mist-ful hands and delivers an Unprettier from the Tower of London position.
• Apparently LVN asked for her release after this match. Odd timing...or is it? 
• This match was so-so for a main event match. I'm not sure if the pace was too slow or if it's a character thing. It didn't drag but it wasn't necessarily anything to write home about and that was what this division was all about once upon a time. 

Winner and NEW Impact Knockouts Champion: Laurel Van Ness

Closing Segment

O.V.E. leader, Sami Callihan meets with Konnan in a park somewhere. Konnan calls Sami ignorant and parts with some sage advice that Sami couldn't care less about because OVE is taking over LAX's territory. Konnan and LAX simply want an Impact World Tag Team Title match and Callihan doesn't mind that as long as Konnan and LAX are out of Impact once they lose. Konnan agrees but says that if Sami reneges on the deal then LAX will destroy and/or torture everything and everyone they know back in Ohio. Konnan says it isn't personal, just business. Callihan mulls over that statement and then turns around and throws a fucking fireball in Konnan's face which leaves him laying. Is it personal now?

This was a tremendous segment. It was something straight out of an HBO television drama only it was done right here. Usually TV-inspired segments (especially in this company) often don't mix well but this was done really well I thought.

Overall Thoughts

Kind of a standard edition of Impact. I thought that Konnan/Callihan sit-down was the best thing on the show. As far as the matches go, there's something about the matches on Impact that are so...I don't know what the word is. They're not bad at all they're good but they just seem like nothing to write home about. Here's hoping this new regime change will FINALLY be the thing to feature this show in a new light.